As officemates, their desks face away from each other. But as bros, this positioning runs deeper. They take on the world together, back to back as it were. Last week they cooperated in an online game where they create their own epidemic and have it take over the world, a la Pinky and the Brain. They have weekly discussions of their gym routines, helping each other to custom craft one according to their bodies' needs. They also have an acute collective knowledge of their company's higher-ups, as they sit in the cafeteria spying on them, trading information from their latest business deals down to how they hold their heads as they pee - some say they even have knowledge of the rate of flow of the pee.
Matt and Andy ignore women as they pose. The Blonde is shocked at Matt's indifference, and Andy is visibly perturbed at the touch of the Brunette.
Early on, they created a blog where they adopted monikers of old Englishmen; sources say that this was "presumably to prepare for their later life together." It can be a complicated dynamic, as Andy created a Twitter account soon after Matt signed on as AssLobster, but as undershirts go, Matt sports the Wife-Beater while Andy prefers the Deep-V. For lunch, Matt gets a burger and fries and Andy gets a sandwich and yogurt (except on Buffalo Chicken Thursdays), and they invariably sit together (except on the day they learned of this entry). At the office, if one leaves the room, the other sets up Pandora so that upon return he'll hear, "Turn around, every now and then I get a little bit lonely..." Inside sources say they are constantly found chuckling at each other's text messages; on the weekends when they have nothing to say, they "ping" on their blackberrys to communicate hey, it's me and I'm here. Sources say this spurred on Matt's long time girlfriend to refer to Andy as Matt's "boyfriend". Consequently, it has recently become public that Andy broke up with his girlfriend.
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